– Should we have separate camps for boys and for girls or should they be in one camp? Or, should we take the boys to one place for a month and girls to another place?
– I think the last option is the best. In principle, unity can only happen among men. Things happen differently among women. The two genders unite on a completely different basis.
– What is the fundamental difference between these two forms of organizing a space?
– Everything we talk about is generally intended for boys. There has to be a special approach to girls and a special method that has to be discussed separately. This is not simple.
The sensation of yourself and the collective, unity, connection, “we” instead of “me” is completely different for girls, who are little women. And we have to develop a completely different approach for them.
One way or another, we are different, in fact, completely opposite in nature. Therefore, the organization of a camp for girls must be different. Generally speaking, creating a camp for girls is very problematic.
Men are drawn to one another. They want to be on one team, they need each other’s help and a friend’s shoulder. Their attraction to one another and to a group is instilled in them from childhood.
But women don’t have this attraction. They cannot be connected with one another, other than through some kind of community that helps each of them arrange her life better. In that case they agree to something common. Therefore, here the approach must be different.
Their individuality remains. And it has to be expressed and supported, rather than suppressed. When working with boys, we aspire to make them view the collective as higher than the individual. We can’t do that with women. We should not break Nature, but go along with it.
A woman helps men and pulls them closer to unity, while participating in this herself relatively passively, by transmitting to them her desire for a new society that will give her greater confidence and greater realization. But she does not personally participate in building it.
A man builds the new society, while a woman helps him. Without the female desire, a man will not do anything. The man is the builder; the woman is the force that directs him to build.
Right now the most important thing for us is to create the right type of men.
– Besides having a parents day, is it possible to organize a day when the boys prepare and girls visit, and they all have some kind of mutual activities?
– If both sides are prepared, then of course this can be done. But it depends on their age. Before age 11 or 12 there is no point having such meetings because neither of them needs it. Boys feel good alone, and girls feel good alone, as well.
Starting from about age 12 and up (in this regard, a lot depends on the social background and other factors), they start taking interest in one another. This even gets to the point where their entire lives, all of their time, all of their thoughts and desires are filled by the opposite sex. This is the period of swift hormonal growth. We have to understand it and take it into consideration.
Between ages 11 and 14 or even 15, we can organize mutual activities such as games, mutual discussions, and songs. They don’t need anything more than that. This is an age when communication is mostly verbal, purely external.
At an older age they start having other types of communication, including sexual relations and everything else. If we imagine what the consequences might be, we have to decide whether or not we will allow them to be in contact with one another.
This depends on the society, its customs, and the mutual agreement of the parents so the organizers of these events don’t have problems afterwards. This requires a very serious, thoughtful approach and preliminary agreement.
But we aren’t thinking just about how to organize them together in their narrow, closed environment. We have to adapt them to life, so it’s necessary to gradually (after a month of preparation) create a life-like environment, similar to the street, home, the playground, and school.
We have to practically lead them into real life, creating a setting that is as similar to the “battlefield” as possible.
It’s similar to how spies are trained in conditions that resemble the places where they will do the real work. For example, in America, they probably build Siberian villages, and in the Moscow area they probably create something that resembles Manhattan.
So we should create the right conditions for them. And naturally, in these conditions, which resemble real life, there definitely have to be women.