“If one says, ‘I will sin and repent,’ he will not manage to repent” (Yoma 87). The question is, Why?
We found that it is written about the Messiah, “And smell him with the fear of the Lord.” We should understand why the fear of the Creator was compared specifically to Ruach [spirit, spelled like Reyach (smell)].
We see that a person must always inhale Ruach [spirit/wind] or he will lose his life. This air should be going in and out. Once he has inhaled into his body, he must exhale it, and soon after inhale new air. The air he inhaled before helps him only for that moment, and if he wants to continue to exist he must promptly inhale new air.
It is the same with spiritual air, called “fear of heaven.” We must draw fear of heaven every time anew, meaning the acceptance of the burden of the kingdom of heaven he took upon himself before is sufficient only for that moment.
If he wants to continue his spiritual existence, called “faith,” he must take upon himself the burden of the kingdom of heaven once more, and that, too, will only do for that moment, and soon after he will have to draw once more.
He must not wait until he loses the measure of faith that he has taken upon himself, but must constantly draw upon himself faith, time and time again. While faith is still on him, he must renew and extend the fear of heaven, just as is done with breathing physical air, where one does not wait until all the air has been exhaled before he inhales new air. Rather, he renews his breathing every time, meaning replaces the air while the previous air is still in full power.
Likewise, with spiritual air, he should replace the spiritual air he has even though he feels that he can still exist with the faith he has; he must take upon himself once more. If he does not do so, he will finally lose his life, just as one loses his physical life, where if he does not inhale new air, he dies. This is the meaning of “And smell him with the fear of the Lord.”
Likewise, in spirituality, if he does not take upon himself faith once again, he dies. Although he does not feel that he has died, it is like a person who, when he is dead, he does not feel it, but when he is revived he knows that previously he was dead.
So it is in spirituality, when one does not replace the faith, he is considered dead, except that in spirituality, he does not feel it. When he takes upon himself the burden of faith once again, it is considered that he has been revived, as in “the revival of the dead,” a new incarnation, although the power of the body has not been revoked and left.
Accordingly, if a person can relinquish the burden of faith for just a moment, it is tantamount to relinquishing the physical life for a moment. Just as one cannot relinquish this, so he cannot relinquish spiritual life. It follows that one who sins has died, and if he repents, he is a completely different person. It is not that person, but a new creation.
This is the meaning of “If one says, ‘I shall sin and repent,’” meaning that if he sins, he is considered dead. Therefore, this is regarded as “he will not manage to repent” because he died instantaneously. Rather, one who repents is regarded as a new body, meaning a new incarnation.