Q: When I first started my studies, I was very excited whenever I went into the classroom, as though I were floating. Now, I feel almost indifferent. Why does it happen and what do other participants feel?
A: Let me remind you that I do not suggest that people who study with me share their emotions - only their knowledge. I do encourage you to share the text that describes the structure of the worlds, the Creator and their activity.
Q: But I still don’t feel the line between what I feel and what I know and understand. Does this advice relate to that unique feeling - the prayer, which can only be shared with the Creator?
A: Although you do not understand what is happening to you, if you keep changing, you’re making progress! The situation you’re describing is a positive one. In general, the more your moods change, the better. This is the only way for man to progress.
If the desire for spirituality hadn’t been taken from man, he’d be left with no room for self-work. His will to receive (egoism) would snatch for itself all the fruits of the spiritual work. The majority of our spiritual work should take place during those “drops” when spiritual work is tasteless (like dust).
At that point, we might think that it is our sentence from above, in order to prevent us from working for our egos. Rabbi Yehuda Ashlag describes it beautifully in the article, “There is None Else Beside Him.”